Midwest Zine Fest!

Hello Kittens! It's been a few weeks: moving to a new home across town and a lethal cup of coffee to the laptop have hindered my blogging. HOWEVER, I have lots to share and can't wait to update!

This last weekend we drove across the inspiring spring beige-scape to share our love of zines and bring the rainbow to Midwest Zine Fest.

It's like Christmas. But you get copy paper.

Check out the video recap!

Where have you been wandering, muffins?


When Everything is Hard

It's Monday. Mondays are hard.
Here's a list of what to do when everything is hard:

 Build a blanket fort.
Take a bath. With a friend.
Find a rock that feels nice in your hand.
Write yourself a letter to find later.
Put your hands on the ground and visit the planet.
Go to bed while it's still light out.
Drink water. And then drink more water.
Give something away.
Put a flower in your hair.
Arrange your books by color.
Seek out wise washroom graffiti.
Go to moving water.
Stake out in a tree.
Craft it out.
Make a soundtrack and walk around in your movie.
Rearrange your bedroom.
Sport sequins.
Turn off your phone.
Cut up magazines.
Smell all the spices in your pantry. 
Make the washroom a sauna.
Capture a prime-o selfie.
Replace all the lights in your house with string lights.
living room picnic.
Watch that movie you wouldn't tell anyone you like.
Wear wings.
Pillow Pile. Nap. Repeat.
Eat egg rolls on your prettiest plate.
Juice box.
Tarot reading with playing cards.
Let YouTube read you a bedtime story.
Fill a watermelon with vodka.
Work through a coloring book.
Nutella toaster waffle sandwich. Think about it.
Get a bang trim.
Stand on top of a hill to gain perspective.
Linger at the florist in the grocery. Maybe bring some home.
High five the cat.
Put some pipe cleaners on it.
Unplug the computer.
.Pajamas in the dryer.
Sit in the shower and pretend it's a waterfall.
Cover something in stickers


Friday Yummies!

 What's tickling your whiskers this week, kittens?


Craft Adventure: Little Secrets

Instinct compels me to make tiny books--books that feel like little secrets, books you can slip into your pocket and stash under your pillow. This entire series features bite-sized goddess inspired work:

"Lux Mundi" is a fold out, hard cover collection of 10 of my favorite technicolor Madonna illustrations.  She's like a little prayer made out of drawings.

"The Neon Island" is a playful miniature rainbow maze book filled with goddess poetry inspired by the painting that makes up the back of the book. She is finished with a shiny brass brad and string.

"This is We" is a petite limited edition hard cover accordion poetry book with all sorts of rich details. I love painting each wooden heart and hand stamping each cover-- she feels like a little spell book.

 The work bench is full of glue and string as I cook up books for Midwest Zine Fest! What have you been making this week, muffins?


OZ: What the Actual F*ck.

I'd heard some scathingly critical feedback of Disney's latest venture, Oz The Great and Powerful and it's pathetic portrayal of female lead characters and wanted to see what the fuss was about for myself.

Growing up on Disney movies, I wasn't terribly surprised by the reaction--but my curiosity was piqued. It could be entertaining in an awful "oh man, that just happened" guilty pleasure kind of way. Right? Plus, as a Sam Raimi fan, I was interested to see what sort of grotesque madness he would create in the confines of the Disney Compound.

A red flag was raised as we were the only people in the theater on a Saturday night.

It was worse than I imagined.

A sideshow professor con man, Oscar Diggs (James Franco) is spit out into OZ and lauded as a savior by it's citizens. Oscar uses his slimy charm to bullshit and womanize his way to the throne as a "Wizard" while the sister-witches of various directions struggle for political power.

Our protagonist is met with great adversity-- like which one of the sisters to bang.

It takes all of about 10 seconds of Oscar being in Oz before Oscar is IN Oz: schmoozing the pants off of the doe-eyed Theodora almost instantly before insulting the natives.

Raimi could have saved money by trading out the actresses for socks with googly eyes.

All three witches, Theodora, Evanora and Glinda are presented as floppy one dimensional archetypes for Greed, Anger and Naivete.

Evanora (Rachel Weisz)  appears to be the most powerful and therefore the most evil (we know because she has a pointy manicure...)  She is a cruel, power hungry, two-faced-mean-girl. For all we know her evil is fueled by Satan as the story gives her no MO. She is later revealed to be as physically hideous as she is in spirit. (aka: an old woman with psoriasis.) Shocking.

She is banished from Oz.

Theodora (Mila Kunis) is a rage-a-holic child. After brief and flippant hanky-panky romp with Oscar, she is burned so badly by the rejection that she transforms into the Wicked Witch of The West. Though the audience is repeatedly reminded of how "hideous a creature she has become" we certainly see plenty of Theodora's perfectly pushed up lime-green jugs for the remainder of the film.

She and her perfect tits are also banished from Oz.

Glinda (Michelle Williams) is the Glue Sniffing Sunday-School Teacher of the South whom fawns over Oscar, assuring him that even assholes have a destiny. As the cooing incarnation of whiteness and goodness and blondness, she repeatedly saves the day with her bubble magic, risks her life, endures physical pain and public humiliation to secure Oscars rightful place as the Wizard of Oz.

Glinda needs Oscar like she needs a bag of spit.
She makes the Little Mermaid look like Gloria Steinem.

(We're not even going to get into bondage imagery and eroticised violence here...)

And after an underwhelming slappy "girl fight" Oz is at peace with a Wiz on the throne.


The agonizing story wraps up neatly and predictably with the Wizard granting gifts to the underdogs.

These "gifts" include:

Begrudgingly offering to take care of a refugee child. (Who is passed off to Glinda.)
Some kind of wine opener for the gentleman who masterminded their victory.
Bromance to the groveling Monkey-Bell Hop Slave he mistreated throughout the story.
A racially insensitive/creepy minstrel mask for the dwarf he insulted.

And for Glinda? The reward for her risking life and limb and the lively hood of her kingdom to pull off the heist and bring Oscar to power?

Glinda gets the slow dick.

The Moral of The Story: 

Trick everyone around you into doing the work by manipulating them emotionally. 

Girls will do anything if you kiss them.

Douche baggery is the key to greatness.

 Nice work Disney.

Despite it's glaringly sexist nature, awkwardly stilted script and high-school-forensics-competition acting by the entire cast--

the cooky animation of the opening credits is worth a look.

Have you seen Oz The Great and Powerful yet? What were your thoughts? Do you plan to see the film?


What The Eff is Personal Power and How Do I Step Into It?

 I first encountered "Personal Power" while receiving a tarot reading from a friend:  

"It's time to step into your personal power." 

I was too embarrassed to admit that I had NO concept of what personal power really was. Nodding, I imagined some vaguely Arthurian goddess avatar that looked like me, but was too brave to actually be me.

Initially my understanding of power was narrow:
Power = Make people do what you want. Authority. Influence. Affluence.Power was for abrasive personalities and to want power was a yucky attribute.

Power was elusive to me. I didn't understand it, but I was sure I didn't have it.  

My life prior to recognizing my Personal Power was fairly dismal and predictable: crappy unsatisfying work life, constantly over and underwhelmed and an anemic sense of self worth. I was fly paper for poisonous relationships.

All standard parts of life as an Earth Girl, right?


You are born with Personal Power. It's your instinct, your innate energy and where you steer the sparkling yellow submarine of your soul.

Symptoms of abdicated Personal Power might be feeling taken for granted or taken advantage of regularly, a loss of focus or direction, a seemingly incurable suck factor, feeling as though the show is running you--

An infuriating hokey-pokey in which every step forward is accompanied by three steps back.

Sometimes the substance of your spirit is drained or taken by other people or circumstances--
sometimes we relinquish it without realizing what's happened.

Here's the rad news, Muffins:


Personal Power is a renewable resource.

It is free and contains no high fructose corn syrup.

It can be recollected, reclaimed and transformed.

Any. Time. You. Choose.

I like to think of Personal Power as a Magic Lasso that gathers all the parts of your life together. And once they have been wrangled you can decide what parts get to stay and which parts have to go.

 In my experience, I've learned that exercising my Personal Power isn't about forcing your will on other people, but allowing people or opportunities to pass, letting them go and staying true to your course.

 People only have as much power over you as you give them, cupcakes.

Stepping into your Personal Power might be taking a risk (applying for that program you've been dreaming about or auditioning for the part!), breaking ties with a toxic friend, discovering new ways of authentically expressing yourself, giving yourself enough alone time to listen to you thoughts, making a job move, standing up to a bully--

Or putting on your favorite hot pants, planting your feet in the street and decreeing that you are the sovereign Queen of your own damn sequined destiny and aren't gonna take shit from no one, no how. 

Get in there and be your own golden-mulleted Repo (wo)Man.

It's different for everyone.

The Moral of The Personal Power Story is:

Life is no life with out it.
It's never to late to discover it.
It's never to late to take it back.
It's never too much

and you are always Enough.


What are your thoughts on Personal Power? Are you discovering it? Have you had to snatch it back?

Grab your FREE copy of the How To Be a Bossy Mittens eZine and mp3!


Brain Hugs: Gaga Feminism

     "This feminism is about improvisation, customization, and innovation. The gaga feminist, in other words, cannot settle into the house that the culture has built for her. S/he has to tear it down, re imagine the very meaning of house in form and function and only them can s/he rebuild."

I snatched up this book unsure whether it would be a snide essay on the death of feminism or a venture into slobbery idol worship.

Thankfully, and to my pleasure--It is neither.

Jack Halberstram (Professor of English and Director of The Center for Feminist Research at University of Southern California and accomplished gender politics author) presents a feminism that does not fight the fight of our mothers, but a new construction of the Woman Idea that borrows from Marxists theorists, sounding more like science fiction than reality...until you think about it.

 S/he presents Lady Gaga not as a leader or visionary, but simply as an example of a new order of feminism (that already exists)--

An Ism that defies sanity, definition and ideology. A feminism that reflects the saturated, shifting and illogical culture we survive in. 

And an enlightening discussion about Sponge Bob Square Pants.

Halberstram's romp through high and low theory is written with sharp snort inducing humor, inciting thought that makes you uncomfortable to be alone with yourself. Gaga Feminism is by no means a "light read", but asserts itself to be thoroughly entertaining, engaging and provocative.

I give it five out of five monsters.

What are you reading, Muffins?


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